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autosuficiencia:

My ideal body weight is you on top of me.

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swimming-withmermaids:

q’d
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(Source: eroticismzs)

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swimming-withmermaids:

queued 

(Source: igoodtime)

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"My uterus is convinced it needs to take in a boarder."

— Me, on the joys of a biological alarm clock that refuses to be silenced.

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"New drinking game. Every time Mom changes lanes, take a drink."

— Me, because HOLY SHIT she changes lanes a lot.